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What are you learning from your Pain?
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Pain instructs.

I believe God allowed pain to instruct us. It wasn’t his first choice. He is not sadistic to choose pain as an instructor. His first choice was obedience. God’s best plan has always been that we learn by listening to Him and obeying His instructions.

The fallen state of man however, makes it highly possible that we wouldn’t know how to discern the voice of God.

And even when we do, our sin condition often persuades us that there is life outside of LIFE HIMSELF, wisdom outside of the instructions of WISDOM HIMSELF. So we reject God’s instructions.

But God has set things up in such a way that even the negative consequence of being outside of God’s will, is pregnant with opportunities to return to Him. This is the mercy of God in action.

Pain and Hurt is a testament of the mercy of God. Pain is God saying, you didn’t hear me last time, will you hear me now that it hurts?

The trouble is that we have an enemy, His job is to pervert something that God allows for our good, he turns it around for evil.

So when we get hurt in relationships, the hurt was teaching you who you are, what you like, what is important to you.

But the enemy perverts that, and teaches us to hate others for hurting us. Teaches us to live a distrustful life because we’ve been hurt. Teaches us not to try again because failing hurt the last time.

I think this is why it is important to learn to yield our pain to God. When we do, He uses our pain to teach us His lessons.

When we don’t yield our pain to God, we open ourselves up to pick up the perverted lessons that the enemy wants us to learn in pain and hurt.

We don’t need to ask you if you are learning from your pain, because we all are. We do need to ask, what are you learning from your pain?

The right lessons will make you better, not bitter, wiser not foolish. The right lessons will provoke growth not stunt your growth. The right lessons will make you bolder, not more timid.

Don’t waste your pain. Tell God about what hurts. Find good friends who will partner with God to bring out the best lessons from your pain.

This is the gospel, that in darkest and most painful parts of the journey of life, resurrection is possible because God turns our pain and our hurt in to resurrection power!

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Dear Teenager: some truths about your parents – PART 2
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cropped-wordpressimage1.jpgDear friend

I hope my last letter to you helped you to begin to see your parents in a different light. As promised, here is a continuation of my last letter to you.

Dear teenager, yes I know that you get along with that your friend from school or college very well. It is true that they are your best mates. However it is also true that they are teenagers just like you who are discovering who they are. As a teenager, you are an adult which means that you strongly aware that there are choices that YOU have to make in your life…however you are still a child in the sense that you still need guidance(this is one of the most important truths you can accept if you will make the most of your teenage years). Your friends can sometime provide that guidance for you, but they don’t see the bigger picture well enough to ALWAYS give you sound advice. Here’s what I am saying, please form strong friendships with your age mates, but never make a major decision only on the basis of what your mates tell you.

Dear teenager, here is what I have discovered, particularly in my teenage years…in the end, my parents advice or instruction beats advice from my mates…99% of the time! Don’t discover this the hard way!

My child, listen when your father corrects you. Don’t neglect your mother’s instruction. What you learn from them will crown you with grace and be a chain of honor around your neck. (Proverbs 1:8, 9 NLT)

Right now, I understand that being like your friend(s) is really important to you. The truth is that the “coolness” of your friend is important in your world as it is, but it is not the most important thing in the world that you are going into in a few short years. If you could see that your friend in 10 years time, I promise you that you wouldn’t want to be like them! Especially if what they’re calling “cool” flouts every instruction God has given you through your parents. Dear teenager, here’s what I am saying…enjoy your teenage years in every single way that you can, but be a smart teenager.

A smart teenager is one who makes daily decisions today, only after having looked into tomorrow through the windows fashioned by their parents sound Words.

Getting wisdom is the wisest thing you can do! And whatever else you do, develop good judgment. (Proverbs 4:7 NLT)

I hope this helps you. Next time I will write to your parents about you. Together we’ll work this thing out!!

Your God always understands. He can be trusted. His advice, His instructions will never lead us to a future that we will not pleased with. Develop confidence in His Word.

God bless you & keep you.


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Dear Teenager: some truths about your parents
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I recently received an anonymous email from a teenager who was asking for guidance in dealing with their parents in a Godly way. Fortunately I have been a teenager before so here is an open letter to my precious anonymous friend.

Children, obey your parents because you belong to the Lord, for this is the right thing to do. “Honor your father and mother.” This is the first commandment with a promise: If you honor your father and mother, “things will go well for you, and you will have a long life on the earth.” (Ephesians 6:1-3 NLT)

Dear friend

Thank you for your recent letter. Here are some things I have discovered about these special creatures called PARENTS…

There is something in your parents that releases success in you. It is God ordained! Your parents are containers of the blessing of God which can release you into God’s perfect plan for your life. This is why God instructs us to honour them i.e. to give WEIGHT to them, to their words, their instructions and their place in your life. To honour them is to treat them as valuable. They carry something that will cause things to go well for you, but we’ll never receive anything from someone we don’t honour! I know you don’t agree with them on most things, but do not cease to look for ways to honour them at all times! Dear teenager, the TRUTH is that your parents are equipped to help you succeed. Give weight to them!

Every person is unique, every child is unique. Dear teenager, please cut your parents some slack. They are trying to figure this thing out just like you are. Raising every child is a unique experience for the parent. They’ve never been at this place where you are becoming an adult responsible for your own decisions, whilst still being their child who needs their help and guidance. Just like you are going through a change which they need to understand, they are going through a change which you need to understand! They are learning just like you are.

I know you think they hate you, but the truth is that they love you so much that they would risk “hurting” you temporarily in order to ensure that things go well with you permanently. No parent enjoys seeing there children upset. Dad hates to see you upset, but he still can’t trust you to be on your own with that boy, not because he doesn’t believe you have strength of character, but because he knows that when it comes to your body, the wise thing to do is not to test your strength of character…clear strong boundaries are more effective.

Dear friend, i hope this helps. I have more to say to you, so I will write to you again soon. In the meantime, please know that you can ALWAYS trust God. Your parents might not always understand, but God always understands. If you stick to God’s instructions to you regarding your parents, you will ALWAYS come out from any difficult times with your parents…better off!

God bless you & keep you.


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