People don’t have to agree with you to genuinely love you. If agreement is your prerequisite for love, you will never find true love.
One of the big problems we have as human beings is that we are control freaks! This is so evident when there is a disagreement. The silent treatment, the violence, the harsh words etc are often our attempt to coherce the other party to agree with us! The more they resist, the more intense the cohersion.
How to disagree and still communicate love
1- WHEN/IF ASKED be clear about your position. It is not real love if your friends, those who often provide a sounding board, are not clear.
Proverbs 15:22 Where there is no counsel, purposes are frustrated, but with many counselors they are accomplished.
Good friends are God sent because good friends provide the counsel that helps our lives work. When asked, good friends have s responsibility to give clear counsel.
2. Don’t try to control, try to give the advantage!! We all face this challenge with the ones we love. When we are convinced about our position, especially when our loved ones are not standing in the same position, we are so desperate that we often resort to all types of schemes to get them to agree with us.
This is one of the areas that having faith in an all knowing God who has the hearts of kings in His hands makes such a difference. Because I have Jesus, I can afford to deliberately give up the attempt to coherce loved ones into going on the “right” path according to me.
Instead of trying controlling the outcome, pray hard for them and look for a way to give them the advantage. Don’t take a stance that says “you will soon fall flat on your face and I’ll be there to say I told you so!”. Take a stance that says, “you know I don’t think this is the way forward, but you make must also know that as your friend, you never need to doubt that I’m here for you!”. Take ever opportunity to communicate the latter through words and deeds.
Communicate your disagreement appropriately. But never communicate your disagreement stronger than you communicate your love. Speak the Truth…IN LOVE